Hopeless Necromantic by Shiloh Briar
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Hopeless Necromantic by Shiloh Briar

Fantasy

Hopeless Necromantic

Debut

by Shiloh Briar

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Quick take

A necromancer, his skeletal BFF, and their spunky new demon friend explore life, death, and everything in between.

Good to know

  • Illustrated icon, Multiple_Viewpoints

    Multiple viewpoints

  • Illustrated icon, LOL

    LOL

  • Illustrated icon, Graphic_Content

    Graphic violence

  • Illustrated icon, Romantasy

    Romantasy

Synopsis

Four years ago, Sikras ‘Catseye’ Nikabod had it all: a beautiful wife, friends and family, and the endless luxuries that came with being the all-powerful necromancer to the queen.

Now, his brother-in-law is a walking corpse, he’s wanted for tax evasion, his oldest friend, Vessik, has slaughtered thousands of the queen’s people with a skeleton army, and his wife is dead. Sort of.

With the kingdom under threat, it’s only natural for the queen to task Sikras with the totally normal, not-at-all-cruel chore of brutally murdering his dearest friend. Sure. Great. It’s not like he already failed to stop Vessik’s reign of terror twice or anything.

Turns out, it’s hard to kill a monster when you can’t stop remembering the good man he used to be. Harder still when you’re pretty sure his descent into madness is kind of, sort of, hypothetically…all your fault.

Raise a glass. Raise the dead. Just don’t raise your hopes.

Read a sample

Get an early look from the first pages of Hopeless Necromantic.

Hopeless Necromantic

Chapter One

Sikras

Sure, everyone claimed they would do anything to bring back a deceased loved one, but that was because they failed to imagine the ramifications. Unless one had no sense of smell, or a penchant for the stench of decay, undead rarely made satisfying company in the long term. “But, oh,” the people would say, “I never meant for them to return as undead. I meant for them to be alive exactly as they were before.

Too bad.

No matter how hard anyone wished, hoped, or prayed for a loved one to come back to life – to be truly alive – the best a corpse could ever get was a little less dead than they were before.

And that’s where Sikras “Catseye” Nikabod came in.

Necromancy certainly wasn’t the noblest of professions in the kingdom of Nyllmas, nor anywhere in the whole of Siaphara. If Sikras were brutally honest, necromancy was less a “profession” and more an illicit opportunity for magic wielders with questionable moral compasses to make a living by ripping souls from Enos and stuffing them inside corpses, much in the way one shoved cubed bread into a hollowed-out game hen.

But it paid the bills. Illegally. People could balk and wail and organize all the protests they wanted, but for every townsperson who cried about “dead men’s rights,” two or three people would be at Sikras’s doorstep, begging him to resurrect Grandpa.

For that reason, when Sikras smelled the familiar odor of dried blood and rotting flesh outside his mansion’s ornate door, he wasn’t surprised. That meant one of two things: either a strangely independent undead minion waited on his stoop, or he had a new client.

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