“And now,” says the nice interviewer from Modern Woman magazine, “how does it feel to be writing your seventh book?”

“It feels terrific,” lies Eve. “I’m really thrilled to be working on it and I can’t wait to share it with all my readers.”

It’s a nightmare. The words have jammed up for weeks and I don’t know what I’m doing. Everything feels turgid; everything feels pointless. Why did I want to be an author again?

“Can you tell us anything about it?” probes the interviewer.

“Yes, it’s a long family saga about a family called the Wilsons, set between the wars in a large country house.”

“It sounds wonderful!”

“Well, thank you,” says Eve, feeling unconvinced.

“We can’t wait to read it! And now, I know our readers will want to ask: Do you have any advice for aspiring authors?”

“Yes,” says Eve, who has answered this question about twenty-five thousand times and has therefore honed her thoughts. “I do, actually. My advice is to write the book you would like to read yourself. Visualize going into a bookshop and finding the perfect book. The book you would buy immediately. What does it look like? What’s it about? What genre is it? Then write that book. And above all, write the truth. Write what you know and do it convincingly. I don’t mean write nonfiction,” she clarifies. “I mean write the truth about life, whatever genre you’re in.”