What We Kept to Ourselves by Nancy Jooyoun Kim
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What We Kept to Ourselves by Nancy Jooyoun Kim

Historical fiction

What We Kept to Ourselves

by Nancy Jooyoun Kim

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Quick take

Follow one Korean-American family moving between ‘70s and ‘90s LA as they grapple with the meaning of home and dreams.

Good to know

  • Illustrated icon, 400

    400+ pages

  • Illustrated icon, Family_Drama

    Family drama

  • Illustrated icon, Nonlinear_Timeline

    Nonlinear timeline

  • Illustrated icon, Immigration

    Immigration

Synopsis

1999: The Kim family is struggling to move on after their mother, Sunny, vanished a year ago. Sixty-one-year-old John Kim feels more isolated from his grown children, Anastasia and Ronald, than ever before. But one evening, their fragile lives are further upended when John finds the body of a stranger in the backyard, carrying a letter to Sunny, leaving the family with more questions than ever about the stranger’s history and possible connections to their mother.

1977: Sunny is pregnant and has just moved to Los Angeles from Korea with her aloof and often-absent husband. America is not turning out the way she had dreamed it to be, and the loneliness and isolation are broken only by a fateful encounter at a bus stop. The unexpected connection spans the decades and echoes into the family’s lives in the present as they uncover devastating secrets that put not only everything they thought they knew about their mother but their very lives at risk.

Both a riveting page-turner and moving family story, What We Kept to Ourselves masterfully explores the consequences of secrets between parents and children, hus­bands and wives. It is the story of one unforgettable family’s search for home when all seems lost, and a powerful meditation on identity, migration, and what it means to dream in America.

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What We Kept to Ourselves

1999

The night he found the body behind the loquat tree in his yard, John had driven home from work like on any other evening, weighed down by the usual worries. These troubles had become so familiar that he never questioned them anymore, and because he never shared them with anyone, they would forever go unchallenged. It was his misery after all.

These days his concerns hinged on the apocalyptic flavor of the moment—Y2K, or the Millennium Bug—like a futuristic disease or a line dance at a wedding. How could John protect his two children from something he didn’t understand? Asteroids and floods, all that biblical stuff, made more sense than technology, this internet, which was spooky, invisible, and everywhere at once.

But they weren’t even children anymore. His daughter Ana was already an adult, a college graduate living in Berkeley—leafy streets crunching underfoot like granola in the fall and dimly lit coffee shops with dogs snoozing at people’s feet—less than four hundred miles away, but much too far in his mind. And his son Ronald had already finished half his senior year in high school.

The house was quiet with them no longer on the phone, vaporized by this thing called email and AOL. After John had spent over a year saving up for the Packard Bell PC tower, all he could hear now from his son’s bedroom were the robotic chirps and static fuzz of the dial-up, an occasional burst of laughter, his fingers chicken-pecking the keys. Their thoughts and feelings now traveled in wires, through air, like ghosts.

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400+ pages
Ruinous Ends
The Winged Game
Games: A Love Story
The Shrouded Queen
The Last Contract of Isako
Seek the Traitor’s Son
Dissection of a Murder
Blood Bound
Into the Blue
This Kingdom Will Not Kill Me
We Who Will Die
Silver Elite
And Now, Back to You
Dawn of the North
This Book Made Me Think of You
Stolen Midnights
Sunk in Love
Skylark
Rings of Fate
Crux
The Rebel and the Rose
Buckeye
Good Spirits
Red City
The Academy
Wild Reverence
To the Moon and Back
The Lost Baker of Vienna
The River Is Waiting
This Princess Kills Monsters
Bury Our Bones in the Midnight Soil
My Friends
Home of the American Circus
Gifted & Talented
Enchantra
We All Live Here
First-Time Caller
Babylonia
The Favorites
The Thirteenth Child
Most Wonderful
The Courting of Bristol Keats
Pictures of You
PS: I Hate You
The Road of Bones
Intermezzo
The Dagger and the Flame
The Wild Huntress
The Crimson Crown
Here One Moment
Phantasma
The Pairing
All the Colors of the Dark
The God of the Woods
Same As It Ever Was
The Demon of Unrest
Five Broken Blades
Real Americans
Table for Two
The Familiar
A Short Walk Through a Wide World
Just for the Summer
The Wives
A Fate Inked in Blood
The Disappearance of Astrid Bricard
The Fox Wife
The Mayor of Maxwell Street
Ready or Not
Heartless Hunter
The Women
Family Family
Ruthless Vows
Gwen & Art Are Not in Love
The Frozen River
The Future
What We Kept to Ourselves
Wellness
Happiness Falls
Shark Heart
Love, Theoretically
The Only One Left
The First Ladies
Warrior Girl Unearthed
The True Love Experiment
Did You Hear About Kitty Karr?
Yours Truly
Hello Beautiful
I Have Some Questions for You
The Last Russian Doll
The Shards
Hell Bent
Age of Vice
A Wilderness of Stars
Before I Let Go
The Last Party
Foul Lady Fortune
Sign Here
Thistlefoot
Bronze Drum
Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow
The Wedding Dress Sewing Circle
Part of Your World
Lessons in Chemistry
The Good Left Undone
Kaikeyi
True Biz
Booth
Peach Blossom Spring
Black Cake
Will
Still Life
The Keeper of Night
The Book of Magic
The Lincoln Highway
Apples Never Fall
In Every Mirror She's Black
Damnation Spring
One Last Stop
Half Sick of Shadows
The Girl with Stars in Her Eyes
What Comes After
In a Book Club Far Away
The Four Winds
Black Buck
The City We Became
The Prophets
Legendborn
The Star-Crossed Sisters of Tuscany
The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue
Friends and Strangers
Evicted
The End of October
The Book of Longings
The Great Believers
Yes No Maybe So
Anna K
Red, White & Royal Blue
Ninth House
Frankly in Love
Permanent Record
The Reckless Oath We Made
The Boy and Girl Who Broke the World
The Gifted School
Ask Again, Yes
Night Music
Small Fry
One Day in December
Nine Perfect Strangers
The Clockmaker's Daughter
The Great Alone
The Heart’s Invisible Furies
The Ministry of Utmost Happiness
The Nightingale
Behold the Dreamers
A Gentleman in Moscow
Salt to the Sea
400+ pages
View all
Ruinous Ends
The Winged Game
Games: A Love Story
The Shrouded Queen
The Last Contract of Isako
Seek the Traitor’s Son
Dissection of a Murder
Blood Bound
Into the Blue
This Kingdom Will Not Kill Me
We Who Will Die
Silver Elite
And Now, Back to You
Dawn of the North
This Book Made Me Think of You
Stolen Midnights
Sunk in Love
Skylark
Rings of Fate
Crux
The Rebel and the Rose
Buckeye
Good Spirits
Red City
The Academy
Wild Reverence
To the Moon and Back
The Lost Baker of Vienna
The River Is Waiting
This Princess Kills Monsters
Bury Our Bones in the Midnight Soil
My Friends
Home of the American Circus
Gifted & Talented
Enchantra
We All Live Here
First-Time Caller
Babylonia
The Favorites
The Thirteenth Child
Most Wonderful
The Courting of Bristol Keats
Pictures of You
PS: I Hate You
The Road of Bones
Intermezzo
The Dagger and the Flame
The Wild Huntress
The Crimson Crown
Here One Moment
Phantasma
The Pairing
All the Colors of the Dark
The God of the Woods
Same As It Ever Was
The Demon of Unrest
Five Broken Blades
Real Americans
Table for Two
The Familiar
A Short Walk Through a Wide World
Just for the Summer
The Wives
A Fate Inked in Blood
The Disappearance of Astrid Bricard
The Fox Wife
The Mayor of Maxwell Street
Ready or Not
Heartless Hunter
The Women
Family Family
Ruthless Vows
Gwen & Art Are Not in Love
The Frozen River
The Future
What We Kept to Ourselves
Wellness
Happiness Falls
Shark Heart
Love, Theoretically
The Only One Left
The First Ladies
Warrior Girl Unearthed
The True Love Experiment
Did You Hear About Kitty Karr?
Yours Truly
Hello Beautiful
I Have Some Questions for You
The Last Russian Doll
The Shards
Hell Bent
Age of Vice
A Wilderness of Stars
Before I Let Go
The Last Party
Foul Lady Fortune
Sign Here
Thistlefoot
Bronze Drum
Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow
The Wedding Dress Sewing Circle
Part of Your World
Lessons in Chemistry
The Good Left Undone
Kaikeyi
True Biz
Booth
Peach Blossom Spring
Black Cake
Will
Still Life
The Keeper of Night
The Book of Magic
The Lincoln Highway
Apples Never Fall
In Every Mirror She's Black
Damnation Spring
One Last Stop
Half Sick of Shadows
The Girl with Stars in Her Eyes
What Comes After
In a Book Club Far Away
The Four Winds
Black Buck
The City We Became
The Prophets
Legendborn
The Star-Crossed Sisters of Tuscany
The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue
Friends and Strangers
Evicted
The End of October
The Book of Longings
The Great Believers
Yes No Maybe So
Anna K
Red, White & Royal Blue
Ninth House
Frankly in Love
Permanent Record
The Reckless Oath We Made
The Boy and Girl Who Broke the World
The Gifted School
Ask Again, Yes
Night Music
Small Fry
One Day in December
Nine Perfect Strangers
The Clockmaker's Daughter
The Great Alone
The Heart’s Invisible Furies
The Ministry of Utmost Happiness
The Nightingale
Behold the Dreamers
A Gentleman in Moscow
Salt to the Sea